Christmas with Heather.


First of all, ya’all, I am pretty much caught up to “real time” on the blog. There are a few things I will still post about but for the most part, we are right up to real time in our relationship with Heather. That means as things happen and come up in this thing called life, ya’all are going to know about it, like, stat. Well maybe not that fast because, come on, let’s be real, I am a working mom, I don’t have that much time on my hands!!! But I can’t wait to share in this journey with you all.

But this last weekend we were invited to spend some time with Heather and her family as they celebrate Christmas. Heather said it was going to be her and her kids, her mom, her sister and her children, her aunt and uncle and her cousin and her children. I love when extended family gets to see us and Jackson. So, of course we said YES!


First, let me tell you the struggles because let’s be honest it wouldn’t be the holidays without a little drama! Mya (Heather’s daughter) was not having it when we first got there. She was being shy and hiding under Heather’s shirt. And at one point I told Heather I don’t think she likes me right now!! She was giving me some major stink eye! And you know, the more I thought about it, she might not at this time be all that fond of me. Think about it. We come in and everyone is excited to see Jackson and us (well, more Jackson than us, but that is ok!!!) and she loses a little bit of attention. And she is a middle child, so there is a struggle there to begin with! But she finally warmed up and the kids had a great time. Of course that was until it was time for us to leave and they got to see the “real” side of Jackson who did not want to leave, was over stimulated and over tired, leaving us with an epic meltdown all the way to the car, in the car, and the ride home! Let’s hope they still think we are good parents after that show!! Thank you Jackson.


But secondly, Heather told us “no gifts” per Aunt Mary. Which I think we were the only ones that actually listened to Aunt Mary, including Aunt Mary herself! We were all meeting at McDonald’s so the kids could play and the adults could hang out. Which much to my surprise we were actually able to do! Jackson is very much an only child and likes when mom and dad play with him, so it is a struggle to get him to play with other kids and not want his mom and dad in there too. We are working on this! But he did a pretty good job playing with the kids and allowed us to hang out with Heather and her family. We talked about planning a camping trip next year, which will hopefully also include my parents!!!


Upon our arrival, Heather’s aunt and uncle gave each family a $25 McDonald’s gift card to buy lunch. So much for no gifts! But how incredibly kind of them to buy these gift cards for their family but to also include us was incredible.


As the kids played and the adults talked, we talked a little bit about their family Christmas traditions. One of them being, Aunt Mary baking cookies and giving them to the kids to decorate. They also talked about Grandma’s wreaths that she has attempted to make but never taste the same as Grandma’s. It is amazing how in each family there is something Grandma used to make and no one is able to make it taste like Grandmas! As Mary and Jim were getting ready to leave she brought in these bags full of goodies and cookies to decorate for each family, including ours. This is where it is hard for me to find the words to describe how that made us feel. Oh, and the card she wrote just made my heart melt, describing their family traditions and how Grandma and Grandpa would love seeing all their grandchildren and great grandchildren decorating the cookies.  This would be the Grandpa Jackson’s middle name is after, Lawrence. My heart just could not take it. Allowing Jackson to know his birth-families’ traditions and including him (and us) in them were all this mama could take for one day. Oh, and I thought the wreaths tasted great!!!


When we got home that Saturday we took full advantage of being part of their Christmas traditions and decorated the cookies from Aunt Mary! I would be lying if I said I wasn’t a little emotional that night. I love being part of their family. I love knowing about Jackson’s birth family. I love knowing their traditions. I love being around them. I love this life we have created, together!  I love this relationship that we have.



One response to “Christmas with Heather.”

  1. Christmas has come and gone, and I hope everyone had a very Merry Christmas!
    This Christmas was very special for me for so many different reasons.

    First, seeing my children at church on Christmas eve in a play was beyond amazing. Marvell playing Joseph, standing tall with a smile on his face by the manger. Mya and my niece Cora, as beautiful angels, acting out the night Jesus was born – all melted my heart. To sing wonderful praises to the Lord with my children, mom, and sister among a room full of other believers just brightens my soul, and was a breathtaking reminder what the Christmas spirit is all about – the birth of our Lord and savior!
    Secondly, being able to spend time with all my family this Christmas was so fulfilling as we come to the end of 2017.

    My parents have been divorced since I was a baby, so growing up, all holiday celebrations were split into two. I always spent Christmas Eve with my mom’s side of my family, which involved going to church and our grandparent’s house, eating together (and enjoying all of grandma’s awesome baked goods), and spending literally hours going around the living room and everyone opening up one gift at a time as we laughed, talked, and embraced the love you felt all around their home. Remembering those days, I also remember my Grandma always expressing the reason for the season and always expressed her absolute love for Jesus. It’s been a little over 10 years since my grandparents passed, and Christmas just hasn’t been the same since for my mom’s side of the family. We don’t get together like how we used to. I’ve come to realize that it never will be the same, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be beautiful. Moving forward this last decade from those amazing Christmas Eve’s with Grandma and Grandpa has been a journey, but we finally have created and started our own Christmas eve traditions with my mom and I love that.
    This year, getting together with my mom, sister, cousin Becky, Aunt Mary, Uncle Jim, our children AND the Heesch Family! WOW!!!
    I am just so happy that we all got together. I’m so happy that more of my extended family and the Heesch family got to meet! I can’t even explain how it makes me feel. I’m so glad that the Heesch family gets to experience the love my family has to give. I’m so glad that they welcome that love. I’m so grateful that they are my friends!
    On top of getting together, my Aunt Mary is just so awesome and treated everyone to lunch and reminded everyone of those Christmas traditions and goodies with our grandparents. My Aunt Mary has always been just so giving and so caring, and has such a heart of gold! I know getting together made my mother so happy, and it just brings me so much happiness to see everyone happy, especially during this time. & it was super fun watching the kids play and interact with one another!
    After getting together, I went home and was just so thankful for my family. I admit, I cried a little bit when I ate a peanut butter ball (my favorite), then laughed it off, because my kids laughed at me. & as I watched my kids decorate their Christmas cookies, knowing that my nieces, little cousins, and Jackson all get to do the same, my heart was just so full! How amazing and special!

    Also, just an FYI – JJ and Jessica are STILL the best parents ever!!! Even after seeing Jackson’s meltdown (haha)… I’ve been through plenty of meltdowns and tantrums in my life, so I totally understand what’s going on. I mean, my daughter Mya had a little meltdown right when we got there and it took awhile for her to get out of the funk. & Jessica – don’t take it personally, Mya gives EVERYONE the stink eye when she’s moody (even me)! Thank you JJ and Jessica for trying to love her through it with me (even if you feel like you failed)!

    Also since I can remember, on Christmas morning, my dad’s side of the family gets together for breakfast. This year, we didn’t have anything planned, but ultimately, we made it happen! & we had Christmas breakfast at my house! My dad, grandma, papa, aunt, siblings, cousins, and our children all were able to get together Christmas morning. I know that made my Grandma very happy and her Christmas complete, and I’m happy that we still all get together!
    Jessica, I just want to thank you again for starting this blog! I can’t wait to keep hearing the journey through your eyes! & hear all about Heesch family traditions & what’s going on in your lives! You really have helped our communication in this open adoption & it really is an awesome thing for your family, and for mine!


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